Workin’ It- The Importance of Recovery Time

5 Apr

 *What follows is a conversation between husband and wife regarding sexy time.  If you would rather that your virgin eyes remain in your virginal head, STOP HERE. 

Me:  Sounds like you’ve shaken that cold.

Hubby:  Yeah, this one really wiped me out.

Me:  I noticed.  You’ve gone to bed early every night this week. 

Hubby:  I know.  The NyQuil knocked me out.  I didn’t even need your girly bits to fall asleep.

Me:  *giggle*  That’s ok, my vage needs a break once in a while.

Hubby:  (Sarcastic disbelief) Really?  Your vage needs a break?

Me:  It gets tired if it works out too much.   Picture a Richard Simmons video where my vage is sweating to the oldies.  It needs to recover.

Hubby:  NO, DMTF!  I will not picture your vage as Richard Simmons!!!

 
*A moment of silence while I check an incoming text message*

Me:  Ok, picture…

Hubby:  I KNEW IT!

Me:  …listen, picture my vage wearing a sweatband and workout gear.

Hubby:  I don’t know what you mean.

Workin' It

Can you see it, now?  Do you see how hard it’s working?  Recovery time is important in avoiding injury. 

P.S.:  I’d like to thank my mom for reading this blog.  I will miss her as I know this is the last blog entry she will ever read.

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25 Responses to “Workin’ It- The Importance of Recovery Time”

  1. Miz Parker April 5, 2011 at 12:14 pm #

    What’s DTMF? I always thought it was “Dump that motherfucker!”

    Also, LOL

    • Don't Make That Face April 5, 2011 at 12:16 pm #

      LOL! DMTF is Don’t Make That Face. My boss wouldn’t leave me alone to write this post and I was distracted. He’s really inconsiderate that way.

      • Miz Parker April 5, 2011 at 1:06 pm #

        Aha, and duh. My apparent temporary dyslexia prevented me from making the connection.

        Also, today I talk about how Christopher Walken ruined my life. I noticed you subscribed to my book reviews (thanks!) but I keep two. I’m enjoying your site.

        http://mizparkermuses.wordpress.com

      • Don't Make That Face April 5, 2011 at 1:53 pm #

        You had me at Christopher Walken.

  2. fnkybee April 5, 2011 at 12:56 pm #

    The vag totally needs a break time every now and again!!!

  3. Thypolar April 5, 2011 at 1:42 pm #

    That’s awesome! Love it 😉 Although, I have yet to come to the point in time where my Vag needs a break. Oh shit! Maybe I broke it……..

    • Don't Make That Face April 5, 2011 at 1:53 pm #

      BE CAREFUL! YOU DON’T WANT TO BREAK IT!

      • Ahmnodt Heare April 5, 2011 at 3:25 pm #

        I didn’t want to make that face, but then I saw that Richard Simmons pic. The warning wasn’t strong enough.

      • Don't Make That Face April 5, 2011 at 3:31 pm #

        Yeah, sorry about that. I would like to think, however, that my vage is that serene and healthy.

  4. marinasleeps April 5, 2011 at 5:14 pm #

    OK I am having trouble picturing it … wait … does it have a mohawk or fauxhawk?

  5. Stephen Quammie April 5, 2011 at 5:37 pm #

    I wouldn’t touch that with a 10ft pole! I think my psyche needs recovery time after seeing that picture! I just got seriously mind-f*@ked by Richard Simmons making a cameo appearance down below.

    Your va-jay-jay should be perfectly fine dear (even with the headband and Jewfro).

    Thanks for the laughs….and rare moment of fright I experienced as I was reading this today.

    • Don't Make That Face April 5, 2011 at 11:20 pm #

      The funny thing is, Richard Simmons wouldn’t even know what to do down there.

  6. KristenSays April 6, 2011 at 8:39 am #

    visual detour!! someone give me a pencil so i can poke out my mind’s eye! aaaahhhhh!

  7. BDOC April 6, 2011 at 2:35 pm #

    I just designed a sweatband for my clit.

    Thanks.

  8. KristenSays April 6, 2011 at 3:00 pm #

    BDOC: LOVE IT!!! let me know if you start selling those 😉

  9. Janette Monea Ayub April 6, 2011 at 11:20 pm #

    hahaha..ah, i love you for putting this.
    i need my vage to have a workout, im jealous that you’re in recovery time.
    now, i’m going to have you vage in my head all day! thanks..(it really being mr.simmons im not a creeper like that)

    • Don't Make That Face April 6, 2011 at 11:22 pm #

      It’s one of the joys of marriage. She needs a break once in awhile. 🙂

  10. hilariouslife April 13, 2011 at 4:13 pm #

    I admire you… I don’t have the nerve to talk about my vagina knowing all to well that Mama is watching.
    Did your mom get over it or did she cancel her subscription?

    • Don't Make That Face April 13, 2011 at 4:40 pm #

      I haven’t heard anything from mom yet, but everytime my phone rings and I see that it’s her, my stomach drops a little.

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