Mary Jane Goes Shopping for Thin Mints

14 Mar

Unfortunately, my Girl Scout cookies arrived this weekend.  Every year I say I’m not ordering any for myself, and every year I end up writing a very hesitant, shaky, shameful number 2 in the “Thanks-A-Lot” box on the order form.   

Message to Girl Scouts from my fat ass: Thanks-A-Lot.

I then spend the weekend guarding my two boxes like a lioness, snarling and snapping at anyone who dares even look at them.  My hopes are that the boxes will survive the weekend so I can take them to work on Monday to enjoy with my morning coffee.  I wish I could say they last me awhile, but they don’t.  I don’t share.  They’re gone by Wednesday. 

While catching up on some of my favorite blogs over the weekend I came across this news clip about some California 5th graders that accidentally ate pot cookies.   The clip is hilarious for many  reasons, including the crazy scenario that led up to the series of events, and the fact that these kids are such light weights.  The video also begs the question:

Why haven’t the Girl Scouts of America thought of this yet? 

If the Girl Scouts invited a pot cookie:

  1. The cookies would have to be frosted or Dorito flavored or frosted and Dorito flavored.
  2.  In keeping with the Girl Scout tradition of rearing strong and independent women, the cookie would be called Mary Jane Goes Shopping.  They would come in the shape of stilettos, purses, and lipstick. 
  3. People would get the munchies from eating the cookies and, therefore, would crave more cookies.  It would be a vicious cycle of  eat, munchies, eat.  The Girl Scouts would make a killing.
  4. The badge for selling this cookie would be blank signifying the lack of motivation one gets from ingesting cannabis. 
  5. The Girl Scouts would be able to justify their $3.50/box price tag.

I will be expecting a Thanks-a-lot note from the Girl Scouts of America for my brilliant idea.


7 Responses to “Mary Jane Goes Shopping for Thin Mints”

  1. Tricia March 14, 2011 at 4:42 pm #

    Girl scout cookie season is a mixed blessing. I love the samoas, but I know they are horrible for me! Here’s a funny girl scout cookie cartoon a friend sent me:

  2. My Parents Are Crazier Than Yours March 14, 2011 at 8:07 pm #

    You are hilarious!!

  3. DressySJP March 17, 2011 at 7:58 am #

    i am OBSESSED with thin mints….
    we aren’t alone on this girl scout problem of ours 🙂

  4. trailertrashdeluxe March 18, 2011 at 7:59 pm #

    Love how the little girl looks like “the sun really is bright today, man.” I suppose if I was 8 or 10 years old I’d be high for a couple days on a cookie too, though.

    • Don't Make That Face March 18, 2011 at 8:08 pm #

      LOL! It wouldn’t take much for a little kid, but still. They need to buck up.

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